Natexus by Victoria L. James

Author:Victoria L. James
Language: eng
Format: azw3, epub, mobi
Tags: Romance
Publisher: Victoria L. James
Published: 2016-01-28T00:00:00+00:00

THE TIME IN BETWEEN

People always say it’s not easy to pretend.

I found that funny. Pretending seemed to be the easiest thing in the world to me after that.

I pretended it didn’t hurt. It was easier than feeling the pain.

I pretended I didn’t search for him in the corridors at school.

I pretended I didn’t miss him after twelve months of silence.

I pretended I didn’t want him with me when I went to university.

I pretended I never thought of him.

I pretended to grow.

I pretended to live.

I pretended to be happy.

I pretended to have fun.

I pretended to forget.

I pretended I wasn’t pretending.

I pretended not to think of him on my 18th birthday.

I pretended not to dream of him on my 19th birthday.

I pretended not to remember him on my 20th birthday.

I pretended not to wonder about him on my 21st birthday.

I pretended not to miss him on my 22nd birthday.

I pretended he’d been rotten all along.

I pretended he was the villain in my story – that he had been cruel, twisted, and evil.

I pretended to believe all the lies I told myself.

I pretended I didn’t love him, that there was nothing about him for me to love.

I pretended and pretended and pretended until pretending was all I knew.

I pretended that everything was normal, everything was good, everything was great.

It was easy.

It was easier than letting myself drown.

Who wanted to sink to the bottom of the ocean with the weight of their thoughts, when closing your eyes and allowing yourself to float on the surface made each day seem so much more peaceful?

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